Get a Haircut

hair

Do you have Covid hair, but have not yet ventured out to a barber or beautician? I’ve waxed poetic this week with a little piece of silliness about hair.

Why is that if you change your hair, everyone has to comment on it? “You got a haircut,” they say, as if the elves cut it while you were asleep and you hadn’t noticed.

And as if one amazing discovery isn’t enough, “Did you get a perm?” No, my hair is curly when short.

“Did you change the color?” No, same as always.

And, of course, “I like it.”

Ninety-nine percent of those who like it also have short hair. Surprise!

GET A HAIRCUT

Do you need someone’s opinion?
Get a haircut.
Do you want some criticism?
Get a haircut.
If you really want it,
And intend to not condone it,
And never will bemoan it.
Get a haircut.

Do you want some shorter tresses?
Get a haircut.
Say goodbye to big hair messes
Get a haircut.
If your budget can’t do Pravda,
And you think you really oughta
Do what you know you gotta,
Get a haircut.

Do you want some sideways glances?
Get a haircut.
Do you dream of new romances?
Get a haircut.
Do you feel a little miffed?
Could you use a major lift?
Let imagination drift.
Get a haircut.

Do your friends nitpick too much
About your haircut?
Do they notice when you blush
About your haircut?
Do you wish that they would drop it,
Try a little less to mock it,
And pretend you never got it,
A new haircut.

Have you had too much attention
Since your haircut?
Do you wish no one would mention
Your new haircut?
Could they just leave you alone,
And let your life go on
Without comments, smirks, and groans
About your haircut?

To find out who your friends are,
Get a haircut.
They will sometimes go too far
About a haircut.
People simply can’t resist
And so they will persist
To drive your life amiss
About a haircut.

Why can’t they just shut-up
About your haircut?
You’re ready to blow up
About your haircut.
Don’t they know that it will grow?
And you don’t need them to show,
What they think you oughta know
About your haircut.

Could they mind their own bee’s wax
About your haircut?
Yes, you got beneath the ax
And got a haircut!
If you wanted a critique,
You would let the info leak.
Right now you’re up a creek.
You got a haircut.

You didn’t know you had bad hair
Before your haircut.
Now you’re getting stale hot air
About your haircut.
If it was so bad before,
Why can’t they just ignore?
And not rag you any more
About your haircut.

Copyright 2009 Sheila Moss

About Sheila Moss

My stories are about daily life and the funny things that happen to all of us. My columns have been published in numerous newspapers, magazines, anthologies, and websites.
This entry was posted in Fashion, Humor and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Get a Haircut

  1. drooger says:

    Wow! You must have eaten all the proper foods for a month and slept like a log the day before you wrote that up. It took a lot of thought to right all that about a hair cut.

    Liked by 1 person

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