Facebook Syndrome

Facebook is the most visited site on the internet. Over 2.80 billion people are regular users and half of them visit every day to post, network, socialize, or play games. Have you become addicted to Facebook? Can you really stop using Facebook any time you want or have you traded social networking for social dysfunction?


Are You Addicted?

If Facebook is the homepage on your computer, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you know the difference between your news feed and your page feed, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you think social networking is a good way to make friends, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you frequently check your smart phone for Facebook updates, you might be addicted.
If you think 5000 friends are not enough, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you play Farm Heroes, Candy Crush, or Criminal Case, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you “like” your own posts, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you have an app that posts your blog to Facebook, you might be addicted.
If you know the difference between a News Feed and a Page Feed, you might be addicted.
If you feel hurt when your friends don’t tag you in photos, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you read every one of the email notifications from Facebook, you might be addicted.
If anyone has unfriended you for excessive posting, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you have invited friends you don’t know, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you think Facebook friends are actually real friends, you might be addicted.
If you have ever said, “Not right now, I’m on Facebook, you might be addicted.
If you think about Facebook even when you are not logged in, you might be addicted.
If you send birthday wishes to all your Facebook friends, you might be addicted.
If you spend more than one hour a day on Facebook, you might be addicted.
If you try to find old classmates from high school on Facebook, you might be addicted.
If you use Facebook to invite people to your social events, you might be addicted.
If you are frequently late because you are on Facebook, you might be addicted.
If you take pictures of your food and post it on Facebook, you might be addicted.
If you update your status more than several times a day, you might be addicted to Facebook.
If you understand what all of this stuff is, you might be addicted to Facebook.

If only a few of these are true, you are probably okay and don’t have to worry. On the other hand, if you are like the rest of us, better get on the wagon to recovery.


Twelve Steps of Facebook Anonymous

1. We admitted we were powerless over Facebook – that our friend list had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that giving up social networking could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our News Feed over to the posts of others.
4. Made a searching and fearless inventory of our Facebook posts and comments.
5. Admitted to God, ourselves, and in a Facebook post the exact extent of our addiction.
6. Were entirely ready to have all our passwords deleted.
7. Humbly removed all our photos.
8. Made a list of all the friends we don’t know personally and became willing to unfriend them.
9. Unfriended people wherever possible, except when to do so would embarrass them or others.
10. Continued to take inventory of our posts and if we were posting too frequently, promptly admit it.
11. Sought through personal contact to improve our face-to-face relationships with real people, asking only for the willpower to avoid checking in on Facebook.
12. Having had an awakening as the result of these steps, you tried to carry this message to other Facebook addicts… and immediately decided the best way to do this was by posting about your recovery on Facebook.


SERENITY PRAYER FOR FACEBOOK USERS

Lord, help me to post about the things that matter, to comment on the opinions I cannot change, and the wisdom to know what to “like.”


Copyright 2011 Sheila Moss
http://www.humorcolumnist.com

About Sheila Moss

My stories are about daily life and the funny things that happen to all of us. My columns have been published in numerous newspapers, magazines, anthologies, and websites.
This entry was posted in Entertainment, Humor, Technology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Facebook Syndrome

  1. This Facebook thing sounds a lot like WordPress.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s