The Shoe Carnival

shoecarnival.jpg

Just like the changing leaves, football, and kids returning to school, the change of season signals a change in fashion and time to go to the Shoe Carnival.

How did all those winter shoes get so scuffed up just sitting in the closet for the summer while I was wearing sandals? It might be possible to ignore the scuffed heel on the right shoe made by driving. Man, I must really live life in the fast lane – the left shoe is practically like new.

Even if I could ignore that ugly scuff which, after all, is on the back where I can’t see it, sooner or later I have to look down and see those pointy toes. Pointy toes? A definite sign that these are shoes that fashion has left behind. Square toes, big fat heels, that’s the new fashion. That’s what I’m wishing for! No doubt about it — time for a trip to the Shoe Carnival.

The Shoe Carnival is a self-serve shoe store like no other. Somehow they seem to think that creating a carnival atmosphere is the way to sell shoes. The DJ occupies a stand in the middle of the store and barks out all the sales and wonderful deals that are going on. When he is not on the mic, loud — I said LOUD — music blares. It is always 50’s music or some other equally awful tune.

So, why go there, you may wonder? The deals! The shoes! The bargains! This week, “Buy one pair and get the other at half price!” What self-respecting bargain hunter could pass that by? Especially when she looks down and sees those pointy toes grinning up at her. Why did she ever think those toes looked good?

Finding the first pair is easy. Instantly I spot exactly what I’m looking for. Maroon. Perfect fit. Look great. Now for the second pair. I’ve gotta have a second pair to get ‘em for half price. Trying on pair after pair: too large, too tight, or too ugly. Panic sets in. Black – that’s it. I can always use a pair of black shoes.

Finally, the perfect pair is rescued from behind a display of pointy toes, obviously held-over-for-another-season due-to-popular-demand. Square toes, big fat stacked heels. Ah, fashion. Then the DJ, evil man, barks out a deal on Reebok Princess’, the kind I like, at half price – and I don’t even have to buy another pair. It’s more than I can stand.

Barely able to see over the pile of boxes in my arms, I happily hand over the plastic card and check out. Another successful trip to the Shoe Carnival. If you can just stand the awful music long enough, you can always get deal.

Heck, that was fun! Wonder if they have anything in red? If I ever get over this headache, I might come back and shop here again.

©1998 Sheila Moss

Author’s Note: I am not an employee of Shoe Carnival and was not compensated in any way for writing this article. 

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About Sheila Moss

My stories are about daily life and the funny things that happen to all of us. My columns have been published in numerous newspapers, magazines, anthologies, and websites. SUBSCRIBE to my weekly columns hot off the keyboard and not available on my blog: humorcolumnist-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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6 Responses to The Shoe Carnival

  1. With such loud music blaring, the term “hoofing it out of there” seems like an appropriate pun — especially if you’re wearing your new shoes! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow, sounds awful! I like to fondle shoes in a peaceful environment. Gently stroking the 5 inch heels I can no longer wear until I find my way to the old lady shoes.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. energywriter says:

    Funny! Not my idea of shopping, esp. for shoes. I have weird feet so need to be fitted at one of the few stores that still do that. Costs more, but it works.

    Liked by 1 person

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