Sometimes I feel as if I’m always about two paces behind the rest of the world and trying to keep up. I just don’t seem to be able to get everything done. I hate people who are always late, always making excuses — and now I’m becoming one of them.
I put off things that I don’t want to do, like pay my income taxes, for instance. That’s something that you can’t put off too long unless you want to end up in big trouble. But I can put it off for a little while — so I do.
I already have the tax form filled out, and that’s the hard part. Well, actually, the hard part is getting all the receipts and information together. I put that off too, but I finally got my act together about mid March.
So, my taxes were filed electronically. All I have to do is write out a check. Why do I keep waiting until the last minute? It is going to cost the same amount regardless.
And I need to make hotel reservations for a vacation. It’s a phone call, that’s all. The plane tickets are reserved, but for some strange reason I keep putting off the call to the hotel. I’ll do it tomorrow when I have more time.
But I never have more time.
I’m putting off doctor appointments until my prescriptions run out and I either have to make an appointment or do without medicine. And the dentist? Forget it! I post-phoned my appointment and changed it to a later date when have more time.
“Just do it and get it over with,” says my honey. Yes, I know, but there’s always tomorrow. Why be in a hurry? And because I’m not in a hurry, it never gets done.
Finally, last night, things caved in on me.
I called the hotel and the rooms were all booked. They squeezed me in. I have to get organized as my life has gone askew. It is the small things, the easy things, but when the list gets long enough, it becomes a big thing, like carrying around a backpack of bricks.
I finally buckled and tried to do everything in one evening.
I thought I was finished, until today when I started to remember the things that I forgot to do — like send the lawn guy a check for mowing the yard. I really meant to do that too. When my grass is six inches high, I’ll be asking, Did I remember to pay him?
My life is consumed by trivia, details, small stuff. It’s the minor things in life that rule. Small things should only take a minute or two, but when all the minutes are end to end, they reach into eternity.
I have no time. I have no life. It is consumed with trivial pursuit, unimportant stuff, minor details that become major because they don’t get done.
Maybe I’ll turn over a new leaf. Maybe I’ll start doing things as they come up instead of letting them go until they can go on no longer.
Who am I kidding? I’m thinking of ways to avoid doing what I don’t want to do right now. I need to go to the post office, but it looks as if it may rain. I can get stamps tomorrow.
It’s easier to make excuses than to make a “to do” list. Somehow it makes me feel important to believe that I don’t have time.
I just hope the IRS will understand.