Did you know that today, Monday, April 18th is National Columnists’ Day? No? That’s what I figured. Somehow, no one seems to be rushing out to buy flowers and candy for Columnists’ Day. Somehow, no one even seems to know that such a day exists, especially since we have so many other important things on April 18th, like the Pulitzer Prize announcements and the due date for Income Tax returns.
It’s hard for an obscure day to compete with better known and better celebrated events.
“Did you know that Monday is National Columnists’ Day?” I asked my honey.
“National what?”
I tried to explain, but I could tell that he was more interested in what was on television. And it isn’t even football season. Thank goodness. If it was football season he wouldn’t even hear me ask.
“Did you know that Monday is National Columnists’ Day?” I asked my daughter.
“Why is it so close to Easter?” My daughter asked.
“It isn’t that close ,” I mumbled. “Easter was early this year.”
No bunny for Columnists’ Day, no basket of goodies, no candy eggs, no anything expect maybe a nod from a few columnists that remember. Mostly even columnists forget.
“Did you know that Monday is National Columnists’ Day?” I asked my son.
“Really? That’s great! Can we have lasagna?”
“Lasagna? What does that have to do with Columnists’ Day?” My son likes lasagna even better than Garfield in the comics. Any excuse for making lasagna is a good enough for him.
“I have all the stuff already,” he hinted, “the ricotta cheese, the mozzarella, the wide noodles, even the tomato sauce.”
Somehow, I think we will be celebrating Lasagna Day this year, maybe even today.
I’ll ask my grandson. He always learns about famous holidays in school. He will be excited about my day.
“Did you know that Monday is National Columnists Day?” I asked my grandson. But his face was glued to his iPad. He was in the middle of some kind of computer game. I don’t think he heard me ask. Not that it matters, he doesn’t like lasagna anyhow. He likes spaghetti with marinara, but only if the noodles are the thin kind.
Well, I have one person left, my granddaughter. She is old enough to start learning about holidays.
“Did you know that Monday is National Columnists Day?”
She squealed. Little girls always squeal. I don’t know why.
“Oh, goody!” she said. “Can we make a cake with candles on it? What’s a columnist, grandma?”
I guess I might as well give up. No one cares about National Columnists’ Day.
National Columnists’ Day is a day celebrated by columnists who, we hope, enlighten, entertain, and amuse their readers on a continuing basis. It is on April 18th because that is the day that the famous World War II correspondent and columnist, Ernie Pyle, died. It is not only to honor him, but to also honor all columnists everywhere.
I looked at the dog and asked, “Did you know that Monday is National Columnists’ Day?” She looked at me quizzically. “Silly, question,” she thought in doggy thoughts. “Did you know it is also Pet Owners Independence Day?”
“It’s time for her to go to for a walk,” my honey said, putting on her leash and taking her away. Just when I was about to get her to help me celebrate too.
The cat ran out of the room before I could even ask. “I give up. I might as well go make lasagna and forget about April 18th.” At least lasagna is appreciated around here.
I know, I’ll ask my readers. They will know what a columnist is, and will not have to be bribed with lasagna.
So, did you know that April 18th is National Columnists’ Day? Please don’t all comment at once to wish me a happy day.
©2011
The term “columnist” often refers to columnists, bloggers and other writers of the serial essay, either in print or online. If you write, do you consider yourself a columnist?
A funny take on a serious topic. Good job, Sheila.
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Happy Columnists’ Day!! Here’s some flowers. 😁 🌻🌺💐🌸🌼🌾🌷🌹🌻🌻🌺💐💐🌸🌼🌷🌹🌻🌺🌼💐🌸🌹🌹🌹
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Happy National Columnists’ Day! The world is a funnier place because of you.
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