Mid Life Crisis

Posted on May 31, 2016 by Sheila Moss

sunsetwoman

Middle age is when you first suspect your body of betrayal..

Middle age is when everyone else suddenly becomes younger.

Middle age is when you refuse a senior discount because you’re not old enough.

Middle age is when you’d rather take a nap than go out on the town.

Middle age is when you realize there’s not much time left to worry about getting old.

Middle age is when you’ve already seen more than you want to — several times.

Middle age is when the opposite sex doesn’t seem quite as sexy anymore.

Middle age is when you notice how small the fine print is.

Middle age is when you’ve done it all, but can’t remember if you had fun doing it.

Middle age is when you get a sneaking suspicion that you might be mortal too.

Middle age is when it seems like there’s a lot more to remember than there use to be.

Middle age is when you decide to buy that red sports car before its too late.

Middle age is when you can’t see how to find your eyeglasses.

Middle age is when you’d like to have an affair, but you don’t have the time or energy.

Middle age is when the chiropractor becomes your best friend.

Middle age is when your dog and your children forget who you are.

Middle age is when you decide the bathroom mirror is a liar.

Middle age is when you’re positive you still remember sex.

©1998 Sheila Moss
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About Sheila Moss

My stories are about daily life and the funny things that happen to all of us. My columns have been published in numerous newspapers, magazines, anthologies, and websites.
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16 Responses to Mid Life Crisis

  1. Ellen Hawley's avatar Ellen Hawley says:
    June 8, 2016 at 10:43 am

    And middle age is almost infinitely flexible. You’ll find you’re still claiming to be middle aged when you’re 70, just because you can cross the street without help.

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  2. Ann Coleman's avatar Ann Coleman says:
    June 7, 2016 at 1:31 pm

    Sadly, I can relate to all of this!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  3. Homesteading Artist's avatar ArtReach says:
    June 5, 2016 at 6:39 pm

    Reblogged this on ArtReach at Home and commented:
    Originally posted on Humor Columnist Blog. Great list from Sheila Moss about the facts of middle age. If you prefer to take a nap before reading her post – “here’s your sign.” And have a good laugh!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  4. Homesteading Artist's avatar ArtReach says:
    June 5, 2016 at 6:32 pm

    Great list! I’m reblogging!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  5. kaivyn8059's avatar kaivyn8059 says:
    June 1, 2016 at 4:57 am

    Those are gd definations! :-p

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  6. Bun Karyudo's avatar Bun Karyudo says:
    June 1, 2016 at 1:20 am

    This matches my experience pretty much, except for the one about the chiropractor. My best friend is still my optometrist. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  7. midlifemargaritas's avatar midlifemargaritas says:
    May 31, 2016 at 2:05 pm

    *sighs. All so true.

    Liked by 1 person

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  8. energywriter's avatar energywriter says:
    May 31, 2016 at 12:40 pm

    YES! Wait until you hit my age and realize that middle age is a fond memory. sd

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  9. SimplyEtta's avatar EttaD says:
    May 31, 2016 at 7:40 am

    Reblogged this on Simply Etta D. and commented:
    I can identify with a few of these..LOL But don’t consider myself middle aged.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  10. SimplyEtta's avatar EttaD says:
    May 31, 2016 at 7:38 am

    I love this! So true on all counts.

    Liked by 1 person

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