Economics for Blondes

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Money, money, money. The economy is all people seem to be talking about these days. It seems that we are all going to go broke, be homeless, and have no job sooner or later through no fault of our own, of course, but due to government, the pandemic, or big business.

I see a lot of suggestions on how to avoid it as an individual, such as consolidating my debt into one big bill that I can’t pay instead of a having a lot of small unpaid ones. It is called “MasterDebt.” How appropriate. Somehow I’ve always been of the opinion that I couldn’t borrow myself out of debt. Obviously, I’m blonde when it comes to economic matters.

It seems that home loans are not covered by MasterDebt. If I can’t pay my mortgage, experts have another solution. Interest on loans is low now; they say it is a good time to refinance the home interest rate that is putting me and my MasterDebt card into the poor house and avoid foreclosure.

Chances are that if I’ve gotten myself so far in that I am consolidating debt, refinancing, and borrowing from Peter to pay Paul, I am not credit worthy, however, and I can’t get a new mortgage loan. So, I might as well reserve a spot in the soup line and go broke early before the homeless shelters are all full. At least I won’t have to pay property taxes.

Presuming I still have a job or any income, I will still have to pay income taxes unless I am wealthy enough to have tax shelters and know how to avoid it. Since all the money I make is going to pay MasterDebt, interest payments, and taxes, it hardly seems worth the effort.

If I had no income, I would have no taxes. But, without tax payers, the government wouldn’t be able to bail out banks and big businesses so they can continue to overcharge me while I pay off high interest loans and MasterDebt.

Somehow, no matter how simple it all seems, the average blonde just can’t come out on top. If the auto industry went out of business, for example, I would be stuck with an obsolete, gas guzzling car that I couldn’t get parts for and couldn’t sell because it is suddenly worthless.

Of course, that isn’t going to happen as the government will continue to keep automakers afloat, at least for a while. So I need to get rid of that automobile now, before it’s too late. If I don’t have a job, I won’t need a car anyhow.

Things are finally all starting to come together. As I said to start with, we are all going to be broke, homeless, and unemployed before it is over so why worry myself to death about it? Who’s going to bail me out if I am broke, homeless and unemployed? Hope for a stimulus check from the government?

So, I need to follow the advice of the experts and keep on spending to stimulate the economy now why there is still time. I should have plenty of credit available since I consolidated my loans into a MasterDebt.

Where does it all end? I have no idea. If I did, I would go there and collect.

Copyright 2009 Sheila Moss

About Sheila Moss

My stories are about daily life and the funny things that happen to all of us. My columns have been published in numerous newspapers, magazines, anthologies, and websites.
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2 Responses to Economics for Blondes

  1. Sharon Dillon says:

    So true. This is the same reason that years ago, the feds stopped allowing us to claim “interest paid” as a deduction. I’m not blond and I don’t understand either, except that, only so many pockets can be lined and the poorer you are the less lining you get.

    Liked by 1 person

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