Author Archives: Sheila Moss

About Sheila Moss

My stories are about daily life and the funny things that happen to all of us. My columns have been published in numerous newspapers, magazines, anthologies, and websites.

You Know You are on a Diet When:

Posted on April 16, 2016 by Sheila Moss

You are on a first name basis with the diet plan industry. Your refrigerator is empty except for diet cola and lettuce. The harder you try NOT to think about food, the hungrier you become. That was dinner? It was … Continue reading →

Posted in Food, Health, Humor | Tagged Calories, Diet, Exercise, Fattening Foods, Low Cal, Low Carb, Low fat, Sugar Substitute, Veggie Burgers, Weight gain, Yogurt | 13 Comments

I’m Not Fat, I’m Super Size

Posted on April 15, 2016 by Sheila Moss

Did you hear about how obesity could soon be the leading cause of preventable death? Yeah, over one-third (34.9%) of U.S. adults are overweight. Here I thought I was being really smart by not smoking and remembering to fasten my … Continue reading →

Posted in Food, Health, Humor | Tagged Aerobics, cholesterol, Exercise, Fat, Fried foods, Junk food, Lose weight, Low fat, Obesity, Overweight, Snacks, Super size | 9 Comments

How I Learned to Type

Posted on April 14, 2016 by Sheila Moss

In the olden days before personal computers, we learned to type on a machine called a typewriter for lack of a better name. You may have seen one of these in a museum or your parents may even have one … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Technology | Tagged Classes, Easy erase, Education, Failure, Home keys, Humiliation, Learning, Manual typewriter, School, Teachers, Type, Typing | 6 Comments

Say, Can You See?

Posted on April 13, 2016 by Sheila Moss

Is anyone else half blind without glasses, or is it just me? I’m telling you, I just can’t see a thing any more. I’ve been using contact lenses – but I finally decided I am tired of fooling with poking … Continue reading →

Posted in Fashion, Health, Humor | Tagged bifocals, Contacts, Designer frames, Eye doctor, Eye exam, Eyewear, Frameless glasses, glasses, Lasik, Prescription, Second pair glasses | 6 Comments

The Mad Dash

Posted on April 12, 2016 by Sheila Moss

I am excellent at remembering where I left things, which means I am at least of normal intelligence, mental illness does not run in my family, and I nearly always know where I left my purse. Occasionally, however, I find … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Work Humor | Tagged access card, electronic scanner, forgetfulness, garage, in a rush, losing items, misplaced items, parking, parking card | 3 Comments

The Yellow Door

Posted on April 11, 2016 by Sheila Moss

Although few people are aware of this, I could have been a painter if I had not accidentally become a humor writer instead. Recently, I acquired a new front door for my house. “I can paint a door,” I thought. … Continue reading →

Posted in Home, Humor | Tagged antique white, artist, hardware store, masterpieces, paint, semi-gloss, yellow door | 3 Comments

What’s in a Name?

Posted on April 10, 2016 by Sheila Moss

I don’t know why, but I don’t have a nickname. Names and nicknames are said to have a powerful influence on our lives. I’m not really talking about social media nicknames or even CB radio handles, as we used to call … Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Humor | Tagged alternate name, first names, given name, handle, I.D., moniker, names, nicknames, pet name, surname, user names | 8 Comments

The Truth about Husbands

Posted on April 9, 2016 by Sheila Moss

There are two sides to every story, the way he tells it and the way it really happened. A husband has the solution for any problem. It may not work, but he has a solution. Only ask your husband to … Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Home, Humor | Tagged complaints, criticism, excuses, forgetfulness, honey do list, husband, intuition, listening, men, nagging, procrastination | 9 Comments

All About Grits

Posted on April 8, 2016 by Sheila Moss

“What’s that white stuff on my plate? I didn’t order that!” observes any Northerner who goes South and orders breakfast in a southern restaurant for the first time. Northern folks don’t understand grits. Grits come automatically with breakfast in the … Continue reading →

Posted in Food, Humor, Southern Humor | Tagged bacon grease, breakfast, corn, cream of wheat, cultural foods, greens, grits, hominy, lye, lye soap, regional food, southern food | 21 Comments

Mammogram Morning

Posted on April 7, 2016 by Sheila Moss

Mammogram Morning By Sheila Moss – Humor Columnist Blog I talked rapidly as my doctor looked over my chart, hoping that he would not notice that I’d not had a mammogram in two years. “How long since you had a mammogram?” … Continue reading →